Friday, December 22, 2006

Muzzle-tov


Why do animals just slay me? Couldn't you just give this big snoot a smooch?
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As I peruse the various recovery blogs, I find very little emphasis placed on the holidays. We always hear people say "A lot of people go out during the holidays." That's probably true, but my experience has shown a lot of people go out all year long. I'm not sure if the number of people going out during the holidays is statistically significant, but I do know the various functions are a great way to help you to stay clean if you want to.
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After I became an adult, I was never too wild about the holidays. When I was out there, I always hoped for cash so I could drink and use more, but other than that, anything holiday-like in my life was created by my parents.
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My mother had beautiful Christmas things, small houses, lights, Christmas dishes, a beautiful manger set (that Oz ate a few years ago). But it seems like to me the holidays are just something to "get through."
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I can't tell you the number of Thanksgivings and Christmases I spent sitting near my connection's house waiting for him to get home from some family function so I could score. What a miserable way to spend what should be such a loving day. Through the grace of God, I haven't had to do that for many, many years.
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What I love today about the holidays are the Narathons and Alcathons. In Phoenix, there were many throughout the valley and I usually spent most of the four days at Christmas at one after another seeing people I don't normally see throughout the year.
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Here, we may have one club holding an Alcathon, but we are having a big New Year's Eve bash and I've been working on the committee to put that together. It's really been fun. If you aren't in service yet, it's a great way to meet people. I've met a few women that I otherwise probably wouldn't have met.
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I've been a little blue for a few days, I wasn't sure why until I hit on it last night. I probably am blue because I miss my mother. This will be my third Christmas without her, but I still feel some days like I could walk into a room and she'd be sitting there, smiling that loving smile she had.
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My s/o's family are Christmas nuts. We're going to spend the day there and cook a ham. I had so much fun going with him to shop for them. I love to shop and whether I'm buying it for me or someone else, it's really a blast. Yesterday a new woman friend and I went shopping at a discount score. Two women with ADD and and high loads of caffeine in a TJ Maxx is probably not a pretty sight. But we sure had fun.
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Today I'm making my first batch of fantasy fudge to take to the club tonight. I love the fudge from the recipe off marshmallow whip.
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Anyhoo, I have to vacuum now, stopping frequently to wrestle it from Oz' teeth. He views the vacuum as his mortal enemy. So until tomorrow, Muzzle-tov!

3 comments:

Judith said...

I can so relate to feeling like the holidays are something to just get through. Actually, I like Thanksgiving, but I hate Christmas. This year has been... I hate to say almost nice because it is not done yet, but it really hasn't been bad. But I've not placed any expectations on it and been fairly wary. I hope one day I will have a real happy Christmas in some meaningful way, but I don't know what that means yet. It's all one day at a time, and the holidays are that way too.

I wish I could have some of your fudge!

Happy holidays!
Judith

Anna said...

Now that I am sober and have worked the steps I love the holidays! I was told on my first Christmas sober that I have control of wither I would have a miserable one or a happy one.. being the feel good junkie I am I choose to have a happy one. For me I think about all that has been given to me and I can't help but be happy.

Rex said...

Glad you have found the source of some of the blues. I am beginning to very much enjoy the holidays now that I'm sober. We keep it simple and very centered on the reason for the season and family. The thing I really noticed the last year is that I no longer get really stressed out and moody when holidays arrive.