There's a cool ice storm here and a lot of meetings have been cancelled, I'm sure. But we die-hard NA members skidded and slid into our meeting tonight. The topic was Step Three.
It was an emotional meeting. One long-time member is having relationship problems, which are ongoing, and asking if it's God's will to stay in the relationship or go (again). I talked about the pain I put myself through with some bad decisions that I made without some guidance from others.
Life on life's terms, in all its messiness, is truly what it's about after a few years in the camp, isn't it?
There's one thing about messing up your life through self will when you have some time clean. There is nothing between you and the pain but pain. It's where the rubber hits the road and you hunker down and stay clean even though your --- is falling off.
I am so grateful that I was able to stay clean despite some real setbacks in my life. I'm grateful that the thought of using is a distant memory. I'm grateful that I have my NA friends who walk me through life. And I'm especially grateful that the tile floor is laid.
Until tomorrow, sleep tight.
2 comments:
Knowing when to let go and when to keep on "keepin on" can be such a dilema. I guess thats why we pray for that wisdom to know the difference. I have learned that pain can't be my barometer, cuz often its gonna hurt either way. But in the 3rd step we surrender to the "care" of God...so I am willing to trust in that.
Thanks for another good post.
Peace,
Scout
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